when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I wish i was in the wii world.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
