The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Randomize
