Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize
