Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
All the doctor said was why
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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