I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
