Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
