You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Randomize
