Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
