I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
