sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
