I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize