Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
