Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
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