I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
