if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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