This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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