he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
