we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Randomize
