they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
