I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
