Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
