You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
