look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize