i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
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