so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
