The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
What drink are we having for lunch?
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize
