You can't motorboat a personality
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
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