it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
soo... how was my night?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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