Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize