so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize
