Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
