He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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