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Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
