yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Randomize
