I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
