Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
