Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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