Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
