The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
