she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
zippers are such a cool invention
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
