morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
