just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Randomize
