It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
