$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Randomize
