Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
