Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
