yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize