someone owes me an orgasm
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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