they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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