he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
