I hate your face
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize